At least for a few weeks. Well, last week I went to my psychiatrist and she was like almost giving up on me because I was not taking the medicines for depression just because I’m scared to gain weight with them. So I need to gain a little bit of weight and I started to take the medicines again. I don’t want to disappoint my mother and in April there is a music festival which I am going to see my favorite band, Arctic Monkeys, and my idol, the amazing and beautiful Alex Turner. And my mother is worried with me because she thinks I am too weak to go to the festival so I want to be fine to be able to go in it and enjoy it. Then I decided to recover me for a while and I don’t know if I really want it but since last week I’m trying.

And sorry for the delay to come here, beautiful people. I have been busy studying for the tests in school. I am really sorry, I hate not being able to be here.

I love you all, <3

The doctor says I’m her pacient and she doesn’t want me to die. Okay, but I’m just her pacient and she just want my money and her reputation. I’m nothing in her life, nothing. I’m nothing in anybody’s life. I want to get better but I don’t want to get better. I don’t want to gain weight, I want to disappear. I don’t have any reason to live anymore. I’ve lost everything and everyone abandoned me. They just gave up on me and I’m almost doing the same thing.

I can’t stand this anymore. I can’t. This pain is just too real. I want to escape from this miserable life. I want to die.